60576

Joke of the Day

"People in India must really enjoy sandwiches. I heard there were almost 250,000 people in a new deli."

"There's an app for everything today except premature ejaculation but I hear that it's coming soon"

"What's black and all over the place? Michael J Fox's signature."

"[1st date] Me: don't let him know you're a lobster Him: we should check out my hot-tub later Me: 'yeah...sure' *nervously clicks claws*"

"What's the difference between Vietnam and Iraq? George Bush had a plan for getting out of Vietnam."

"If you cross your fingers after surgery you'll heal faster Or maybe that's just super stichin'"

"Teacher: welcome to health class Me: my friend said you can get a girl pregnant by kissing her? Teacher: sir please just mop the floor"

"How did the farmer find his girlfriend? He tractor!"

"Money cant buy happiness . . . but somehow, its more comfortable to cry in a BMW than on a bicycle."

"There's 10 types of people in this world Those who understand binary, and those who don't."