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Joke of the Day
"Trust Mom!"
Next Joke
"A kleptomaniac in a bakery really takes the cake"
"What did Hitler's cat think of the Holocaust? It was purrfect."
"Wife just gave birth to our second child and told me I need to appreciate her more I promised to worship the ground she stomps on"
"Naming your cat ""Whiskers"" is like naming your kid ""Eyebrows."""
"I am addicted. I bought the iPhone, iPad & iTouch & now iBroke, iHomeless & iRegret."
"I started carrying a knife after a mugging attempt a few months ago. After that my mugging attempts have been very successful"
"Ah you love me that's great. Now I'll do a bunch of terrible shit because I need to be sure you love me no matter what"
"If you're sad & lonely If you're sad, lonely & home alone always watch good horror movie & you will feel someone's presence with you."
"""NOAH. YOU WILL BUILD AN ARK"" k ""NOT ""K"" THIS IS IMPORTANT"" Sorry ""THATS OK. TAKE 2 OF EVERY ANIMAL ON IT"" Even fish? *THUNDER* ""NO NOT FISH"