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Joke of the Day
"Why is Hillary Clinton just like a man? Because she won't pull out until she's done."
Next Joke
"What's the last thing you want to hear while using a urinal? ""nice watch"""
"Why's the camel considered the submarine of the desert? Because they're filled with iraqi semen"
"Girls are always taking your hoodies but you take one of their dresses and suddenly they're all like ""we need to talk."""
"Why do football players only dance when good shit happens? Just once I wanna see a QB throw an interception & do a sad, interpretive dance."
"All I had to do to get back into Twitter was type my credit card number into some web site in Japanese! I'M BACK AMERICA!"
"That spray tan made me smell like burnt hair & cat pee with a coconut twist. If I could bottle this stench, I'd call it Jersey Whore Breeze."
"If you are at school, and the urge to take drugs hits you... Speak to the supply teacher.."
"I've seen enough episodes of ""Cops"" to know that you should avoid all people with blurry faces."
"I shouldn't have agreed to be a cowboy's target dummy for lasso throwing practice. How did I get roped into this?"