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Joke of the Day

"My wife & I couldn't agree on which psychic to go to. They were all sad and depressing. ""What did you do?"" We finally found a happy medium"

"I was once blind for 5 years It was a very dark time in my life."

"A blind man stands in a store whirling a dog around his head with the leash. A saleswoman asks ""May I help you, sir?"" ""Nah, just looking around."""

"It's really crazy that you don't hear a round of applause every time you order a salad."

"A guy says to God: ""God... ... to you a minute is like a million years and a penny is like a million dollars. So, could you give me a penny?"" God replies ""Sure, in a minute"""

"Two statisticians walk into a bar... What are the chances of that?"

"What was Saddam Husseins favourite TV show? Despot Housewives"

"Why is the algorithms lecturer so fat? Because he always minimises the running time."

"The interviewer asked me, ""What's your worst quality?"" I said, ""I tend to speak my mind."" He said, ""I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing..."" I said, ""I don't give a fuck what you think."""

"Who is the dogs favourite comedian ? Growlcho Marx !"