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Joke of the Day
"Two crows sitting on a fence. Attempted murder."
Next Joke
"An Olympian walks into a bar and says ""damn""."
"How to stop being intimidated by dates Just think of them as big raisins."
"My 5 stages of grief: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Are you gonna eat that?"
"A neutron walks into a store Neutron : ""How much is this pack of gum"" Store Clerk : ""For you it's no charge"""
"My Vietnamese friends just got married, but by coincidence share the same last name so there was no hassle... It was a Nguyen-Nguyen situation."
"What is Long and narrow and becomes bigger when given a blow ? A balloon."
"1st Witch: What's your new boyfriend like ? 2nd Witch: He's mean nasty ugly smelly and totally evil - but he has some bad points too !"
"Why does Donald Trump watch the olympics? To see how high the mexican pole jumpers can jump."
"I was looking for a subtle way to describe my penis... ...and then I went to /r/minimalism..."