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Joke of the Day

"Me: WHY DID YOU EVEN COME HERE IF YOU DIDN'T WANT TO BE WITH ME!! Him: Ma'am please just take your pizza."

"Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're an asshole."

"What's short, but sometimes funny? a short joke."

"What do you call a black guy flying an air plane? A pilot. You racist asshole."

"Why don't Jehovah's Witnesses celebrate Halloween? Because they don't appreciate random people knocking on their door."

"Have you ever seen the movie ""constipation?"" No? Well that's because it hasn't come out yet."

"Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, ""Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here."" Helium doesn't react."

"Why does a blonde girl have a bruised belly button? She has a blonde boyfriend."

"People who say ""in and of itself"" are responsible for most of the trouble in the world."

"Teacher: Why are you late Joseph? Joseph: Because of a sign down the road. Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late? Joseph: The sign said ""School Ahead Go Slow!"""