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Joke of the Day

"Nutella is made with hazelnuts, milk, real cocoa and pure evil."

"What's the difference between porn and music? Volume..."

"I was going to break up a fight between two Rabbis... But they were just arguing semitics."

"Why are the ""sans"" family of fonts so serious? No one wants to be comic sans."

"I had a pretty confused childhood because I thought obituaries are actually advertisements selling dead people."

"Christianity is the ultimate daddy issue."

"What do you call a three-footed aardvark? A yardvark!"

"So I saw a black guy running down the street with a TV I then shouted, ""Hey that is mine!"" but I then realised that mine was at home polishing my shoes"

"Me: *empties 4's maracas 4: *shakes maracas* They're broken Me: Oh no.. What happend?"

"I did laundry for 7 miles according to my Fitbit that I accidentally washed and dried."