58495

Joke of the Day

"How many Marines does it take to change a lightbulb? Four, one to change it and three to comment on the changing."

"Did you hear about the painting that was falsely sent to prison? He was framed."

"I was told I look like a nazi soldier... And I said, ""no, this is a Wehrmacht uniform""."

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's an obscure number, you wouldn't know it."

"God, grant me the serenity to yell at immigrant children, the courage to still say I'm a Christian, and the ignorance to not get the irony."

"What's worse than a blowjob from Willie Nelson? That ain't Willie Nelson."

"What do you think Mozart is doing right now? Decomposing."

"This is a joke about my balls but its pretty funny Why were my balls wet? cause i dipped em' in the wishing well! LOL"

"My attention span is shorter than donuts are better with sprinkles."

"Muhammad Ali was apparently bad in bed, says his widow. Then again, he was a fighter, not a lover."