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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone at the party except you."

"The church are upset about a new type of Heroin, called ""Jesus"" They hate it when people take the Lord's name in vein."

"I try to find the good in every situation. Wait. That was a typo. I meant ""food."" I try to find the food in every situation."

"I understand feminism My wife gets to decide what she cooks for me!"

"Why did Captain Kirk take such a long time in the washroom? Because he was fighting the Klingons."

"I got to test the new self driving prototype, the Ford Dixie But it crashed and I can't get the police to help. They hang up every time after I tell them ""My Dixie wrecked"""

"Scrabble is adding 5,000 new words including ""chillax"" and ""selfie."" So kids, there's never been a better time to challenge your grandparents to a game of Scrabble."

"So, nothing rhymes with orange, huh? *changes name to MC Orange, wins every rap battle, and retires undefeated*"

"What did the duck say when she bought some lipstick? Put it on my bill."

"Another Math Joke Two cats are sitting on a roof. Which one will fall off first? The one with the smaller mu."