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Joke of the Day

"I don't know why /r/deadbedrooms complains so much about starfish sex. Personally, it really turns me on when her arms grow back."

"No really, keep talking. I'm just training for the eyeroll olympics."

"What do you call getting high and having sex? A kush and push."

"If they put a woman on the $10 bill... Wouldn't it be $7.70?"

"well i was going to climb mount everest but this yelp review says theres a nude man at the summit swinging chains around and yelling ""fuck u"

"Why did the boy die when a car ran over his finger? His finger was up his nose."

"What's the square root of 69? It's 8 something right?"

"I'm not here to make FRIENDS - David Schwimmer on his day off (it is 1996 in this tweet)"

"Pretty sure airport food was priced by children just learning about numbers. ""Ok Brian, how much should this apple cost?"" SIXTY TWO DOLLARS!"

"Jokes on reddit are always original and hilarious."