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Joke of the Day

"Do you know about the unpredictable weather in Syria? Sometimes it's Sunni, other times it's Shiite."

"A guy at work calls me ""Partner"" and another guy calls me ""Chief"". Apparently we're playing Cowboys and Indians and I'm a double agent."

"If you see someone wearing camouflage, make sure to walk right into them so they know it's working."

"What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck"

"What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car? The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car? Uber!"

"Good cop: If you just let us know where the body is, we'll let you go Bad Batman: Ben Affleck"

"Hipster farmers don't harvest crops because they're only cool when they're underground."

"i hope people on September 2nd 1885 were flipping out on Back to the Future Part III day"

"My ex broke up with me but left a bag of chips in my car. 3 weeks passed and I texted ""I still got your chips if you want them."""

"I heard there were shenanigans in Iowa last week Apparently it was Hillary's cock and Bernie's ass."