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Joke of the Day

"sorry I had to unfriend you on Facebook after you accepted my Facebook friend request one second after I sent it to you at 3 in the morning"

"I'm gonna be upset when HBO starts killing off Sesame Street characters one by one Game Of Thrones style."

"Clubbing I never have a good time going out to clubs. I can't seem to hit on any girls. All my friends pay to get in and hopefully leave with a one night stand. I pay to stand for one night."

"A guy at work just bought me ice cream and now we're making out. I've never been this intimate with ice cream before."

"Holy lord, that sneeze felt so good I feel like I just cheated. I even named it Stan to further delude myself. I'm such a bad girl!"

"Eight bytes walk into a bar... Eight bytes walk into a bar. The bartender asks, ""Can I get you anything?"" ""Yeah,"" reply the bytes. ""Make us a double."""

"A guy goes to the doctor because he wants to get a prescription for a laxative... After a few checks the doctor nods and says: ""yep, you're full of shit."" and hands him a prescription."

"How do you console someone with bad Grammar Skills ? There, Their, They're."

"Mike Tyson's biggest problem was he never had a strong male role model growing up. Mike's dad walked out on the family very early on, after Mike raped him."

"Did you hear about the rabbit who got a job in a watch factory? Alike did was stand around making faces."