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Joke of the Day

"Apparently ""you have great tweets"" sounds a lot like ""you have great tits"" in a crowded bar."

"Q&A Q: What did Norman Bates call his little sister? (You know you see it coming...) A: Psycho-sis! (I won't let the doorknob hit me on the way out..)"

"E....I...O...U...Y....A ugh, vowel movement. Sorry"

"Terrible pun (I'm sorry) What do you call a guy who travels the world convincing women to have oral sex? A cunning linguist"

"""President Trump, California is revolting!"" ""Yeah, and they're also threatening to secede."""

"schrodinger's joke. It's funny and not funny at the same time, until you tell it to someone."

"ROOMMATE: Big date later? ME: [combs hair] Yes R: Where? M: [fixes tie] The woods R: Is it with a bear again? M: [dabs honey behind ears] No"

"What's the name of Michael J Fox's dry-cleaner? Park and Sons. /Park en sons/ http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t57/Thomzilla/Fazed/michael_j_fox_shaken_not_stirred.gif"

"Three virgins go into a bar; a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Hours later out come a blonde, a brunette, and a virgin. ....Ginger Snap!"

"whenever i see sombody obsessively taking photos of the sunset, i go up to them & whisper ""dont worry.. the sun is gonna come back tomorow"""