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Joke of the Day

"Honey, let's make this cactUS a cacti. What I'm saying is I want a divorce, and I'm taking the cactus with me."

"Mechanical engineers They're not rocket scientists but they are sprocket scientists."

"I hope that bee enjoyed the close-up of my face because that's the last thing he ever saw. #rip"

"What did the oven tell the slice of bread? You're *toast*!"

"Do Irish people make good optometrists? Eye!"

"Two cannibals are eating a clown One says to the other, ""does this taste funny to you""?"

"What is a dentist's favorite musical instrument? A tuba toothpaste."

"What do comic book collectors use in their hair? Mint conditioner."

"What do you call an Asian lobster? A crustasian"

"What did one duck say to the other? Quack!"