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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they"

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"Play Mambo No. 5 at my funeral even if you have to fight my family"
"What is the best way to stop rape? Consent"
"Sex is like a good joke I dont get it"
"What do you call a French vacation? A retreat."
"[Weather Channel Secret Memo] To technical crews: If blizzard doesn't reach predicted intensity, shoot all exteriors through snow-globes."
"A man so poor... A man is so poor that he is unable to pay his exorcist. As a result he was repossessed."
"I bought a shower curtain on Amazon once and now every time I log in Amazon acts like I'm the guy who fucking loves buying shower curtains."
"I cannot even fathom how deep the snow is back east! Get my drift?"
"An Irishman and Two British men Walk into a bar......."