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Joke of the Day

"PILOT OVER INTERCOM: alright folks, by a show of hands, who has ever made a small and understandable mistake?"

"Sorry I headbutted you, I was gonna punch you but, I was holding wine."

"I put on a pretty expensive perfume and went into an Apple Store Everyone enjoyed; it is good they don't have any Windows."

"I have never met a farmer that isn't pro tractor"

"What do GTA and the third Reich have in common? If you have a star, you are getting chased."

"What do you call 100 lesbians with assault rifles? Militia Etheridge"

"Are you going to take a bath? No I'm leaving it where it is."

"Two Asians are watching the weather forecast... ... and the forecast reports that there will be showers in the area. The first Asian says, ""Oh man!"" And the second Asian says, ""Bah, rain."""

"This one time I swallowed a gum and my mom told me that ""it stays in your system forever,"" so I swallowed a table to stick it under it."

"Save your money ...you never know when your friends will need it."