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Joke of the Day
"What's Adam Sandler's favorite salsa? Medium Pace"
Next Joke
"sent someone a text that said ""you need medieval catheter"" when i actually meant ""medical attention"" and i didn't bother correcting myself"
"Why do bachelors like smart women? Because they're so rare."
"God could've saved us a lot of time by just giving us one commandment. Thou shalt not enjoy thyself."
"Jesus walks into a bar... orders a glass of tap water."
"someone asked : are you coming? me: No, but I'm breathing fast... them: me: them: me: I guess I'll save that one for Twitter"
"[test driving car with car salesman] *parks on make out hill*"
"What does Mrs Dracula say to Mr Dracula when he leaves for work in the evening? Have a nice bite!"
"When standing on top of a staircase, it becomes a universal mode of transport. Where it goes is up to you."
"There are 4 million battered women in the US. But I like mine plain."