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Joke of the Day

"[After 20 min at your house] I used all your toilet paper ""Check in the cabine-"" All of it ""We have more in the gar-"" All of it all of it"

"So a guy walks into a bar with a gun... Who had sex with my wife!!? A man shouts from the back, *you don't have enough bullets bro*!"

"What do you call fake pasta? An impasta"

"My dad use to take me to the circus to see the tattooed man and the bearded lady. Now, I can see them anytime shopping at Walmart."

"Food wedding anniversaries: Year 1: champagne 2: strawberries 3: chocolate 4: donuts 5: protein shakes 6: microwave meal 7: Rat poison"

"What do you call poor pasta? Spaghetto."

"Apple is coming out with a product for Asians.. The iOpener.."

"Ey gurl, is your name Andromeda? Because you got a heavenly body! It's 5:50AM and I still can't sleep."

"Circus stocks are up Because the clowns sure are making a killing."

"Did you ever think about ten years ago you'd be saying.. ""I really hope this is a chick I'm talking to""."