5509

Joke of the Day

"Woke up at 5 am. Early to bed early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. Not to mention completely delusional about being healthy, wealthy, and wise."

"A psychiatrist is just a friend you pay to listen to your problems because your other friends are tired of hearing about them."

"AIN'T NO PARTY LIKE A WINDOWS 7 PARTY 'CAUSE A WINDOWS 7 PARTY DON'T STFILE \$win_nt$.~bt\NTKRNLMP.EXE cannot be open error 7"

"Dad-Son Dad: There's this test we need to go for. Son: You never told me earlier! I'm going to fail now. Dad: It's a DNA test. You have to pass."

"I don't see why racists are upset with Harriet Tubman being on the $20 bill... They can finally legally own a black person again."

"What's the worst thing about being Thai? Everyone automatically assumes you have a small dick, even though you're a female."

"What do you call a collection of memes? A memeoir."

"What did Japan say when it heard the US had an atomic bomb? Did you make that Fermi?"

"The difference between a comedian and a psycopath is good delivery"

"What's got no teeth and smells? The gearbox in the wife's car..."