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Joke of the Day

"Q: What do you call a bunch of dead black people in a barn? A: Out dated farming equipment."

"Regretting the compliment... A woman walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, ""Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?"" He says, ""Really! Why? Are my eyes bulging?"""

"Reddit accounts should be treated like underwear. If you can keep them clean you could keep the same one for a while, but if you flood them with shit you should get a new one."

"Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton are on a boat that is sinking, who survives? America."

"How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it."

"I was in bed with the wife the other night and she said if I turned the bedside light out she'd take it up the arse... Maybe I should have let it cool down a bit first."

"I tried to blow a hair off my laptop screen so now there's some spit next to the hair."

"Scratches and dents on the doors of your car are the side effects of bad driving."

"A new study discovered Scientists have discovered a new phenomenon while studying one side of a road on which a bull was staying on They call this phenomenon: Curb-On-The-Ox-Side"

"[at my funeral] So young, how did he die? He ran into oncoming traffic after walking past a group of adults saying the word ""bae"""