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Joke of the Day

"A Polish guy goes to the eye doctor The doctor holds up a chart: K Z S Y X W K P G and asks the man if he can read it. ""Read it?"" he says, ""I *know* the guy!"""

"""50 Cent for 2Pacs of Eminems!? That's Ludacris!"""

"""Let me get them digits."" - creepy accountant"

"I was watching Star Wars in English Class And a classmate says ""metaphors be with you"""

"There is no panic like the panic you feel when you think you may have clogged the toilet at someone else's house."

"Best pun ...EVER Unfortunately I didn't go to the Gym today but the cashiers name at McDonald's was Jim .... So same thing, right??"

"[movie theater] Her: *Hands me popcorn bag* Can you put this down? Me: *grabs bag* You stupid, overpriced, salty piece of shit!"

"Why is everyone impatiently awaiting the new Zelda game? It's Hylian-ticipated"

"Why was the circuit arrested? Because it was charged with battery!"

"If I like my job am I a ""gruntled"" employee??"