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Joke of the Day

"Someone stole my identity. And then sent it back with $100 and a note that said ""So sorry man. Hope things work out."""

"There was a blackout in the streets of Houston yesterday... Don't worry, the police have everything under control..... they shot him."

"How do you make your wife scream during sex? You call and tell her about it."

"I saw on Facebook my ex wanted to get into water sports I recommended waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay"

"Certainty Fewer things in life are certain than death, taxes and if you name your son Chester he will touch children"

"What is the hardest part of eating a vegetable ? Putting her back in the wheel chair"

"Why couldn't R get to P? He had to wait in a Q!"

"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired."

"What do you call the slimy stuff between dinosaurs' toes? Slow cavemen."

"What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An Investigator!"