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Joke of the Day

"The Model Her Garb was just pure Garbage, and she had a silly old Bag: she drank so much that we all went Dutch.-and of course she lost her Rag."

"me (on desert island): good thing i was able to grab this CD player & my 5 fav CDs other survivor: I saw you put down bread & pick those up"

"Why didn't Mario put more toppings on his pizza? Because there wasn't mushroom on it."

"What's the difference between yogurt and America? Yogurt could develop a culture after 200 years"

"Pots and pans set: $70. Wrapping paper: $5. Tape: $3. Watching your mother unbox and attempt to wrap said pots and pans: priceless."

"You hear about the accident involving the mustang and the t bird? There was horse shit and feathers everywhere! My grandpa died 12 years ago this week, thought I'd share his favorite joke."

"It's hotter than A Nazi oven in the summer."

"Thank you to the brave tree who sacrificed its life so that I could have this giant receipt from CVS for purchasing a pack of Dentyne Ice."

"A skeleton walks into a bar and says, ?Give me a beer and a mop.?"

"What do two people with Parkinson's disease do when they meet for the first time? They shake hands."