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Joke of the Day

"How do you think the whole Deflategate situation feels to Tom Brady now? Probably doesn't feel how he prefers it to..."

"People who do not use the grocery store divider bar can rot in hell."

"As a kid, I used to think $5,000 was a lot of money. But now that I'm an adult, I think it's a tremendous amount of money."

"I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time."

"What's the opposite of 4chan? 4chad"

"What kind of bee produces milk? A BOOBEE!"

"How can you tell a mechanic got laid? He has one clean finger"

"People say that Twitter is pointless but it's teaching my children to be self sufficient."

"Are there any medium rappers? They're always big or lil"

"Never trust an atom They make up everything."