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Joke of the Day

"If I had a dollar for every woman who found me unattractive... They would eventually find me attractive"

"I made up a new word Plagiarism"

"Pro tip: If he pretends he can't hear you, talk some shit about his mother."

"I eat my pop tarts frozen like the vikings used to have them."

"You won't believe how these like-minded high schoolers are luring new student victims! Clique Bait"

"The other night I had a dream I was being wanked off by a Ghost. I was scared stiff."

"Roses are red Violets are blue Stop clicking your pen when you talk to me Kevin I swear I will murder your face with my tape dispenser"

"A gymnast walks into a bar... He gets a two-point deduction and ruins his chance of a medal."

"Doctor: ""Hey, how are you?"" Patient: ""I am good"" Doctor: ""Ok. Next."""

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to change the bulb and four to beat the shit out of the black guy who was originally hired to change the bulb."