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Joke of the Day

"What does a Doctor do when he needs 50 bags full of fruits? He goes to Orlando and checks the Pulse."

"Potato Chip are like car company they are very good at making air bags."

"So I was driving down the street when I saw a couple guys trying to take an old lady's purse. I ran her over to help We got it off her eventually"

"<-----Will never confess the actual number of house cats he's forced outdoors when the owner wasn't looking"

"No rule against wearing an old Halloween costume to Thanksgiving. Let your racist uncle talk presidential politics with Donkey from Shrek."

"Two men see a dog licking its nads The first man says, ""I wish I could do that."" The second man says, ""What do you mean? Anyone can lick a dog's nads."""

"What did Zelda tell Link when he couldn't unlock the door? Triforce"

"Apologies to General Tso for what I'm about to do to his chicken."

"[job interview] ""Why do you want to leave your current job?"" My boss is a total idiot ""It says here you're self-employed?"" Yes that's right"

"Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? BECAUSE There was no chemistry. LOL"