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Joke of the Day

"I can take two pieces of rope eat them wait an hour then shit them out tied together.... I shit you knot... ha shit you knot"

"""She's got legs. She knows how to use them."" ""So she's ambulatory then?"" ""... I guess?"" ""And is that really all you're looking for?"""

"I'd like to travel to Holland Wooden shoe?"

"Don't fall for it black people, white people only invite us to go camping to see how long we stay alive."

"What do horny terrorists in airplanes do? High jack."

"What do you call a Roman with pubic hairs stuck between his teeth? Glad-he-ate-her."

"Where did the Knights of the Round Table park their horses? In the Sir Lance Lot"

"Don't you just hate when people reply with ""This?"" This."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's okay, he woke up."

"When I call 911, I'm gonna do a Sean Connery impersonation to briefly amuse the jurors at my trial."