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Joke of the Day

"A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem... He says,""Give me 2 shots..."" The bartender cuts him off saying,""You only get one shot."""

"Why did the cold war last so long? The US couldn't stop Stalin."

"my grade for geography will be out of this world."

"me: [raises hand] my date: again, that's not necessary"

"I employed a new gardener and gave him a list of tasks to do, when I returned he had only done tasks 1,3,5 and 7 on the list. Turns out he's an odd job man."

"Squishing breasts an blasting them with radiation to cancer prevention is like... Sticking a Molotov cocktail up your butt and spraying sparks at it for prostate health."

"What did the Jewish pedophile say to the children? Want to buy a piece of candy?"

"If a group of necrophiliacs ran into group of zombies...who would do the chasing? Oh, I went there...;)"

"Shia muslims are not welcome in the City of Brotherly Love... Because it's always sunni in Philadelphia."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Chin and Tony ! Chin and Tony who ? Chin and Tonyk !"