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Joke of the Day

"So Oxygen, Hydrogen, Sulfur, Sodium, and phosphorus walk into a bar. The bartender says ""OH SNAP"""

"If you were 8 years old when ""red, red wine"" was released UB40 now."

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Gagged. Credit to my house-mate for this gem!"

"Coffee... If you're British, it may not be your cup of tea."

"What do Eskimos and Tupperware have in common? They both love a tight seal!"

"I've always wanted to walk into a large room and be the most beautiful woman in there. But I'm scared of Walmarts :("

"It's gonna be tough for Brad Pitt to start dating again. Everybody knows Tomb Raider sequels are terrible."

"What did the cow say to the slaughterhouse worker? You want some beef?"

"Girl, you look like trash. Can I take you out?"

"I don't trust stairs... They always look like they're up to something."