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Joke of the Day

"Coffee... If you're British, it may not be your cup of tea."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field!"

"So there's a guy with a speech impediment.... It's funny because his life is hard, and he was relentlessly ridiculed in grade school."

"BREAKING NEWS: BLIND MAN HAS BEEN SHOT He didn't even see it coming."

"My neighbors thought the tombstones in my yard were festive until they saw their pets' names scrawled on them."

"What do you call the useless objects a company possesses? Asshats (assets - asshats)"

"[alligator store] Clerk: $1500. Thanks Me: not gonna say bye to him? Clerk: uh Me: say it Clerk: goodbye Me: say ""see you later alligator"""

"The Edge falling off stage at that U2 concert... it's comedy on at least two levels."

"Did you guys hear about the joke about the high wall? It's so funny, I'm still trying to get over it."

"Why do Avon Ladies walk funny? Their lipstick."