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Joke of the Day

"Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't 10% off"

"Two years ago I became a proud father. My son is 6, but he was kinda lame those first four years."

"What does a redneck garden gnome hate more than anything? Transplants"

"So If the Pope shits in a toilet.... Does that make it holy shit? Aaaand thats my shitpost for the day."

"My wife ran away with my best friend. I haven't met him yet."

"Merry Christmas and Happy Ho idays to friends and oved ones c ose and far. B essings to you and yours this Yu e season. This is my no-L greeting!"

"What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer? A prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again."

"I was speaking to a computer technician. ""How do you make a motherboard?"" I asked him. He said, ""Tell her about my job."""

"I remember when peer pressure was all about drugs and promiscuous sex. Now it's Fitbit and who has the best gluten free recipes."

"A man walks into a bar... ... He ended up with three stiches on his nose."