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Joke of the Day

"Kate who dumped me at junior school now wants me to like her interior decorating Facebook page. How the tables have turned Kate."

"""I'M NEVER DRINKING AGAIN!"" Brain: LOL Empty bottles: LOL Wine shop owner: LOL New bottle: LOL Bottle opener: LOL Liver: LOL Me: LOL"

"Q.How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb? A. 3. 1 to find the bulb 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man."

"TOP STORY: Do websites create articles with lists and arbitrary numbers to get you to click through? Here are 15 examples you wont believe"

"Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn."

"Extra virgin olive oil is just olive oil who got dating advice from me."

"How do you get Pikachu on the bus? Pokemon"

"I'm not saying I did terrible things last night, but Satan just woke up on my couch and won't make eye contact."

"""She's got legs. She knows how to use them."" ""So she's ambulatory then?"" ""... I guess?"" ""And is that really all you're looking for?"""

"The Black Third Grader Goes To His Mom. He asks his mom, ""Mom, I have the biggest Dick in the third grade! Is that because I am black?"" She replies, ""Nah Nigga, its because your 19!"""