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Joke of the Day
"Hey in my nursing class we just learned how to bathe people can I practice on you?"
Next Joke
"Wanna hear a pizza joke? Nevermind. It's too cheesy."
"""what's your most cherished memory keith?"" [looks at my wife and baby in crowd with loving smile] [leans into mic] i heard a dog laugh once"
"Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?"
"""There's no defense for child pornographers. They are the lowest, most despicable scum on the face of the earth. ...and I fully believe they should be prosecuted as if they were adults."""
"Don't go around telling people what Teresa Ripoll is an anagram of before they've solved it. Spoiler alert"
"My girlfriend is the square root of -100 She's a solid 10 but also imaginary"
"Christian music producers The only Christians who know how to use Logic and Reason."
"The best thing about the south is... They still hang their knickers in the front lawn."
"I want to start a potato chip company called ""dick's."" Our motto would tell you to eat a bag of 'em."