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Joke of the Day

"The key to Simon & Garfunkel's success was that one was big and one was small. Before, duos were always the same size. They changed the game"

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"How many Arabs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1.. 2.. 3.. BOOM"
"QUESTION: Why are lifesavers better than men? ANSWER: They come in five flavors."
"What do a creationist and a dude with a dinosaur bone fetish have in common? They both get a hard on when they find a gap in the fossil record."
"What are the 3 rings involved in marriage? 1) The engagement ring 2) The wedding ring 3) The suffering"
"What's the difference between a redneck and a gay man? A redneck marries his sister. A gay man marries a brotha."
"I kept pouring water on my Iphone.. because Siri won't tell me where the terrorists are."
"The best joke ever April fools"
"When my son loses his 1st tooth, Im putting $1 under his pillow and a note that says ""I'll be back with a hammer for the rest. -Tooth Fairy"""
"[On phone] ""Did u see the weather forecast?"" ""No. I refuse to be sucked in by Big Weather."" ""Where are you? Its so noisy."" ""IN A TORNADO."""