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Joke of the Day

"I hear you take milk baths. That's right. Why? I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower!"

"On his 22nd birthday, my brother came out as a transvestite to our family and celebrated by wearing a miniskirt... ...that shows a lot of balls."

"What did the right eye said to the left? Between me and you, ""something smells""."

"Why are there no nice cars in heaven? Because abortions float."

"How do you know if someone is an Alabama fan? Oh don't worry, they'll tell you."

"*brings donuts to work* Co-worker: I have a gluten allergy, so I have to watch what I eat. Me: Cool, then you can WATCH me eat this donut."

"If a woman gave in very fast it's not because of the man but the men that came before him."

"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag? One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers."

"Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill really pisses me off. Now its only worth 2 more then a $10 bill..."

"Roses are red. Violets are blue. Faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't be mad, I'll be there too. Not in the cage but laughing at you."