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Joke of the Day

"Are you guys alright? No you are all left."

"Fact: If you sneak away to fart loudly in private and get caught by some innocent person walking by, you have to now hate that person."

"How do you jerk off a sprinter? Pull a fast one."

"Today holds a lot of meaning to me. Today is the 2 year anniversary that I lost my wife and children I'll never forget that game of cards."

"Could Jesus make a nerd so nerdy that even he couldn't resist giving him a wedgie?"

"It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads."

"Despite being a longtime single dude, I just *know* that legions of ladies want my body. I've got the figure of a Maxim cover girl."

"why does dr. pepper come in a bottle? his wife died."

"What do you call Brienne's Dad? Tarth Vader."

"I told my friend a chemistry joke. He didn't react... I wanted to tell my girlfriend, but SHe doesn't exist."