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Joke of the Day

"Why do people draw sunglasses on the sun? It's like, dude, he's the sun. They make sunglasses because of him."

"I installed a skylight in my apartment... the people who live above me are furious."

"Riddle: What has wings but can't fly, legs but can't walk, and a mouth but can't speak? A dead bird"

"What do you call a hard drive in a hydraulic press? File compression"

"Why do cannibals never go hungry? Because they can make themselves dinner."

"I tripped on a ""slippery when wet"" sign today. I was floored by the irony."

"I used to curcumcise elephants. The pay wasn't very good, but the tips were huge."

"It is tough being a horny pagan with no regular religious holidays... ... because all you can look forward to is getting the Wiccans off."

"If you're seen one shopping centre... You've seen a mall."

"Barber: And how old are you little man? Fred: Eight. Barber: And do you want a haircut? Fred: Well I certainly didn't come in for a shave!"