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Joke of the Day

"I never thought I'd meet the man of my dreams while I was out running errands in sweat pants with no make-up on. And I was right"

"What do you call a Muslim on a plane. The pilot, you racist bitch."

"Here's a joke for all you psychics out there..."

"[my 1st day as a doctor] I can't find a pulse [patient] that's a trashcan. I'm over here [me] hold on, I think this trashcan is dying"

"Why did the period and and semicolon break up? Because they had nothing in comma"

"A Priest, Rapist, Pedophile Walks into a bar He orders a drink.."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a Lickalotopuss"

"Did you hear about that car company having to shut down? It was a saab story."

"Why could the brony butterfly just barely not fly? He was a Fluttershy Posted it because My Little Pony jokes that don't insult bronies are a Rarity."

"Pupil (on phone) : My son has a bad cold and won't be able to come to school today. School Secretary: Who is this? Pupil: This is my father speaking!"