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Joke of the Day

"I filmed myself having sex in 4K I can't wait to upload all 2 megabytes of footage!"

"*eye of the tiger starts to play as I trip & fall down the stairs"

"Why do crippled kids get picked on so much? Because they can't stand up for themselves."

"What do sex and air have in common? It's no big deal unless you aren't getting any. Heard on the radio."

"Heavy metal is not intimidating to me because half of the time it's just the plot of Lord Of The Rings yelled over guitar solos."

"I've seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad."

"The inventor of the dissapointing punchline has died His funeral will be held on Thursday at 2pm."

"I guess traffic is spending the night Because it brought its jammies."

"A man falls in love with a nun and they run away together... The church says it doesn't mind, as long as he doesn't get into the habit."

"What's the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is when you use a feather. Kinky is when you use a whole chicken."