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Joke of the Day

"What did the leper say... What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip!"

"Press ""three"" for Spanish, and press ""fo"" for Ebonics"

"If you see a profile pic with 1 fat girl and 1 pretty girl and can't figure out who's profile it is, make no mistakes... it's the fat one's."

"My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs."

"What's purple-headed and makes women moan? Crib death."

"My paranoid boyfriend broke up with me. ""It's not you,"" he said, looking around. ""It's them."""

"Wile E Coyote: I can't get rid of this headache *TNT explodes* *anvil drops on his head* *bus flattens him* Dr: it's probably stress-related"

"What is 32% black, 45% white... ...gets lit up and changes to blue and red at night? Chicago."

"After an argument with my boss, I decided to leave my job at the helium factory. I don't like to be spoken to in that tone of voice."

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He finally got the gas bill."