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Joke of the Day

"Dad would you like to save some money? I certainly would son. Any suggestions? Sure. Why not buy me a bike then I won't wear my shoes out so fast."

"Trust is knowing you never have to look through their phone."

"Pro debating tip: Shave one eyebrow and draw a new one really high."

"What is black, autist and takes about 9 months to grow. Non of your concern."

"Wish our neighbors would splurge on quieter hookers."

"That awkward moment when Chris Brown sees a hot chick and says ""I'd hit that."""

"What do you call a fake noodle an impasta"

"Americans may be ignorant of other cultures... But at least we invented the hamburger"

"Duck Dynasty guy is right-- if we baptize all those ISIS guys, Iraq will be safe because Christians never start wars for bullshit reasons."

"Jesus walks into a bar... orders a glass of tap water."