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Joke of the Day

"Trust is knowing you never have to look through their phone."

"Some women enjoy eye contact during oral sex on a gentleman Others say it stings."

"So here I am in this internet cafe... ...with the biggest fucking nigger I've ever seen reading every word I ty"

"""I'd hit that if I was drunk."" - Me, driving by a mailbox just now."

"A group of protesters gather outside a physics lab ""What do we want?"" ""Time travel"" ""When do we want it?"" ""Irrelevant"""

"The War on Terrorism.... ....God's way of teaching Geography to Americans."

"Lebron reminds me of Michael Jordan... ...when Jordan played baseball"

"Friend (seeing my bookcases): Wow, have you read all of these books? Me: Have you? Friend: No. Me: Then yes. Yes I have."

"The LIKE button: also for choosing sides in a Facebook argument without saying anything."

"If Han Solo were Mexican... We'd have Juan Solo"