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Joke of the Day

"What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? -Hang onto your leaves this will be no ordinary breeze"

"Any one wanna hear a funny joke? What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?"

"Why do melons have to get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe."

"I'm gonna cook tons of bacon, crush it up and sell it for extra money to support my family. Bacon Bad"

"6: Why are we at the vet? Me: So our pig can't have babies 6: How do you know she doesn't want babies? Me:*looks at my kids* Just a hunch"

"Ever fill a garbage bag, put your foot on it and stomped the hell out of it so it held 9 times what it's supposed to? Yoga pants explained."

"I just opened a new christian restaurant called ""The Lord Giveth"" We also do takeaway."

"I licked 8 lollipops and sealed them in ziplocs during my stomach flu if anyone needs to lose 5lbs by the weekend."

"What did the Japanese man say when he jumped out of Office Depot? SUPPLIES!!!"

"I installed skylights in my home, ...the people that lived above me were furious."