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Joke of the Day

"After several drinks last night, I had a great Buzz. Unfortunately I was no longer able to get a Woody."

"Gosh, hell must be really awkward. I mean there's Hitler, and all the Jews."

"Why should you never order the eggs while in France? Because they are always uf."

"pedophiles are the worst but a close runner-up would be the people who don't get excited when they win stuff on the radio"

"I was at a restaurant and my waitress had a black eye So I ordered really slow, because she obviously doesn't listen"

"A ham sandwich walks into a bar and asks for a cold one. The bartender replies, ""We don't serve food here""."

"I'm sick of tired of people soaking my floor with their wet umbrellas when they come over to visit. I think it's time to make a stand."

"Helen Keller just found out about LSD. She thinks it'll make her see things."

"Accidentally fell asleep smoking an e-cigarette and when I woke up my whole house was on the internet."

"I really dislike my CW, so everyday I steal a Kleenex from her desk. In about 500 days, she's gonna be pissed."