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Joke of the Day

"How many Dallas Cowboys fans does it take to change a lightbulb? They don't. They just talk about when it did work."

"If I see you selling weed, I will call the cops.... and report a robbery across town..... then come over and buy some weed. Safety first."

"Two drums and a symbol fall off a cliff... [www.instantrimshot.com](http://instantrimshot.com/classic/?sound=rimshot)"

"Epilepsy is a real problem, you shouldn't make light of it. Or rather, you shouldn't make light then dark then light at a rapid pace of it."

"""Could you not joke about tragedies?"" my friend once said to me. Studies show that 9 out of 11 people find these kind of jokes to be offensive."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick in a McChicken."

"My buddy purchased a book called ""Double Your Dating"" So I asked him if he could multiply 0 X 2."

"if you just show up to a delivery room in scrubs and carry a videocamera you can usually film like 7 or 8 births before they throw you out"

"Without that little voice in your head you wouldn't be able to read this."

"Netflix suggested I watch my kids."