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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about the Oscar Pistorius drinking game? Every time your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, you take 5 shots."

"New machine at the gym There is a new machine at the gym. It's truly awesome! I almost puked after an hour, it really has it all. Cookies, chocolate bars, chips, sodas."

"Have you heard that some bad dogs are running around burning down dog-houses? It's a rash of arfson."

"As hillbillies age, they're called hillwilliams."

"I can tell a train has been through here recently... You know how I can tell? Cause there is its tracks."

"Two beans on the east coast of Australia Ended up in Cairns."

"Dude, did you hear Willy Nelson's gone..? Yeah..he's on the road again."

"If I jack off in a plane Does it count as Highjacking?"

"When I was a kid, my family was very poor... I remember my dad was cutting Onion and our whole family was crying. Poor Onion. He was such a good dog..."

"What did one wall say to the other? I'll meet you at the corner."