46720

Joke of the Day

"If you're anxious and you know it...Clasp your hands."

"Is it okay to marry your second cousin? [xpost from /r/dadjokes] Sure, as long as you're legally divorced from the first one."

"I went to my first Muslim birthday party yesterday Most of the party games were normal, but fuck me pass the parcel was scary."

"The government forcibly took over MarshallMathers.com They cited Eminem domain"

"What is it called when an old priest and a nun having sex both crap in the bed? Holy fucking shit."

"What does a nine-volt battery and a woman's asshole have in common? Eventually, you're going to put your tongue on both."

"Sometimes I watch Spike TV just to be reassured that I'm not even close to being the biggest asshole in the world."

"My parents say I'm too materialistic... Sent this from my new iPhone 6s Plus by the way."

"Girlfriends are like grenades. If you put a ring on them they won't blow."

"What does a Soldier and a Shoulder have in common? They have access to arms."