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Joke of the Day

"When crossing the Delaware River why did George Washington stand up in the boat ? He was afraid that if he sat down that someone would give him an oar to row !"

"What's the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Phelps can finish a race"

"Today I played chess with some old men in the park. It was hard to round up 32 of them."

"ME: I have chronic pain. It flares up whenever someone challenges my beliefs FRIEND: That's not really how chronic pain works ME: ow owwww"

"When telling your dog he's adopted, make sure to mention that you will never love him as much as the dogs you gave birth to."

"Q: Why did the engineer drive the backwards? A: He had a loco motive."

"Why do chicken coops only have two doors? If they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans."

"What is the worst that can happen to an atheist caricaturist ? To die as a martyr."

"How come arabs are not circumcised? So they have some place to keep their gum safe during a sand storm."

"Why did the cowboy get a wiener dog? Cause he wanted to get along little doggie."