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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when a cow jumps in cold water? Utter udder shudder."

"What did the clock say when he was finished having sex? The time has come."

"Why was the broom late? Because he overswept."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. But how did two flies get in a light bulb?"

"How do you make a Sea Lion? You remove an electron from a Seal!"

"Why do some loudspeakers have holes? For the pleasure of the audiophiles."

"Don't insult me by looking into my eyes. This bra cost me $65."

"How do you top a car? You tep on the brake, toopid."

"What operating system does Varys have on his computer? Unix"

"My friend got drunk on Candy the other day. He said it was liquor-ish"