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Joke of the Day

"Started to compliment my neighbors on their new wallpaper but then I realized they can't hear me through binoculars."

"A dyslexic man walks into a bra..."

"What did the super spy polyatomic ion say when he walked into the bar? The name's Bond, Covalent Bond"

"What should you do if your girlfriend is choking? Back up a couple of inches."

"I'll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome."

"Two men walk into a bar. The third one should've seen it coming."

"Why is the Champs-Elysees lined with trees? So the Germans can march in the shade."

"*Smashes the Sony *Destroys the Panasonic *Pummels the Kenwood *Rips apart the Pioneer ~breaking all stereotypes"

"Hey bro do you remember your first blowjob? How did it taste?"

"Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday."